Thoughts on… Preservation (2014)

SOG2koTA horror film that loves pandering to cliches of the genre, Preservation (2014, dir. Christopher Denham) is a tense watch but is ultimately a bit of a mess. Its synopsis is as follows:

An anesthesiologist must awaken her animal instincts when she, her husband, and her brother-in-law become the quarry of unseen hunters who want to turn them all into trophies. (source)

I recently watched this at 3:30am on a work day. Why, you ask? Because it was part of the splendiferous Shitfest Social, and I would never, ever miss a Shitfest Social for the life of me (except that one I did miss and still regret missing). I love Shitfest Social, where a whole bunch of talkative film lovers get together to watch a film en masse and comment our reactions over at a post hosted by the amazing Eric of Isaacs Picture Conclusions. It’s the best!

If you’d like to know some thoughts I experienced as a result of watching this very special film, read on!

  1. Preservation stars a generic blonde-ish woman as the lead (Wrenn Schmidt), Pornstache from Orange is the New Black (Pablo Schreiber), and Ken Cosgrove from Mad Men (Aaron Staton).
  2. Pornstache and Ken Cosgrove will never be known as their character names. They will always be Pornstache and Ken Cosgrove to me.
  3. I actually didn’t hate this and didn’t think that it was a waste of time.
  4. The cliche of people getting hunted down by unknown assailants in the woods is a very well known one, and is a bit of a tired cliche, but this manages to still be quite tense and thrilling.
  5. That being said, some parts are so ridiculous to the point of having a big LOL.
  6. This film suffers from villains who are seemingly unkillable, some of the most convenient deus ex machina escapes I’ve ever seen (e.g. a wedding ring that can cut through wire cables), and the inevitable killing of the dog that comes along on the camping trip (unforgivable).
  7. It also suffers from its protagonists making really dumb choices, such as Ken Cosgrove hiding in a completely obvious portable toilet from a man who has an assault rifle and a big old knife, and then Ken Cosgrove rattling around inside the portable toilet, thereby giving away his location instantly. Really dumb.
  8. The female protagonist is frail and weak in the first half but somehow becomes a Rambo-style killing machine by the end. Oh, and she’s pregnant.
  9. But yet I didn’t hate it. It was a good time. The cinematography and constant creepy music were great. The storytelling and characters were just really silly.
  10. Anyway, now I’ve had “the bear went over the mountain” lullaby in my head for what seems like a very long time.
  11. As to the ending of the film, if you want a nice explanation look no further than this insightful comment from Gary Greg of The Critical Critic: “I think it’s a social commentary how boys are conditioned to play w/ guns at a young age, and the affect it can have on some, as the teens in the woods seemed to think hunting and killing those people was merely a game; something they learned to do at a young age – just as the little boy in the shopping cart with the toy gun.”
  12. Very nice!
  13. Also, director Christopher Denham was one of the lead actors in Sound of My Voice (2011), which was a great film.

2/5
Watch the trailer here.

9 comments

  1. I had such a fun time watching this for Shiftiest Social. It definitely was a good time.

    1. It was such a good time and I’m already looking forward to the next one! Also I love that ‘Shitfest’ was autocorrected to ‘Shiftiest’! 😀

      1. Hahahaha! Damn autocorrect! I didn’t even notice

  2. Even though I thought the second half of the movie shit on the first half, this was one of the best times I’ve had watching a movie. THANK YOU Anna!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    #bearsies
    #threeamsies

    1. Thank you EI! Such a great time as always! 😀 ❤

      #bearsies
      #mountainsies

      1. theipc · · Reply

        We must do it again!!

        #againsies
        #mustsies

  3. “The female protagonist is frail and weak in the first half but somehow becomes a Rambo-style killing machine by the end.” – Funny reading this. I’m writing up my review on Jurassic World and this line really made me laugh. Point 6 is especially brilliant.

    1. Come to think of it, that was totally the case for Jurassic World as well! Point six was really the part that undid this film, so much silliness and so many ridiculous moments.

  4. […] YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU […]

What do you think? Leave a comment here!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: